How to Stop Missing Someone

Goda Brzozauskaite
  • Mar 31, 2022
  • 4 min read
woman thinking about her old friend

Humans by nature are social animals, and it is quite natural to miss someone with whom you once shared a close bond, be it a spouse, friend, or family member, whether they are living or have sadly passed away

We often miss people for different reasons, and when the longing emotion arises, it can be quite hard to deal with, especially on your own.

However, missing someone should not cause you to feel bad in the long run. If your feelings trouble you for long periods of time, there are different things that can be done. Here are some tips on how to stop missing someone. 

Allow Yourself to Feel It

The feeling of sadness can be completely overwhelming, especially when you miss someone who once played an important role in your life. Many experience feelings such as disbelief, anger, or even guilt. When one's thoughts are centered on their loss, it is quite common for them to feel empty and depleted.

Often, people have heard of ways to cope with their loss, but with their minds being centered completely on their loss, it does not help.

You may intensively miss someone who has recently passed away, but also someone who doesn't miss you or even hurt you. Whatever the reason may be, it is important to know that these feelings will not go away overnight. However, giving space to feel these emotions in their entirety is extremely important in the process of feeling better and overall healing. 

Learn to Cope With Negative Emotions

Negative emotions stop us from thinking and behaving rationally, and it further affects our ability to see situations in their truest forms. When this happens, we only see what we want to see and remember only what we want to remember. This, unfortunately, only prolongs the sadness or grief and prevents us from fully enjoying life. 

Emotions are evidently complex reactions, and we often do not have the skills to deal with them; that is why we struggle and feel overwhelmed. However, there are proven ways to deal with these negative emotions, and here are some expert tips: 

  • Relax – Make use of pleasant and relaxing activities like meditation, art, journaling, reading, walking, art, hiking, or talking to a friend or family member.
  • Analyze – Pay attention to how the feelings of grief, loss, and anger make you feel and which events trigger those feelings so you can prepare in advance.
  • Exercise – Engage in physical activities, particularly aerobic activities, lower your levels of stress and allow yourself to cope better with negative emotions.
  • Let go of the past – Harping negative events robs you of the present and constantly makes you feel bad.

Focus on Yourself

Viewing yourself in your rawest and truest form can be extremely scary but ultimately life-changing. A person who can’t stop missing someone can often have some kind of underlying issue preventing them from moving on. Dealing with difficult issues and missing someone is a painful process, but there is healing in it. 

Therefore, by choosing to look inward, you need to ask yourself why you are missing someone and also how missing them affects you. This is an important step, and you need to be completely honest with yourself, especially if you are ready to start the process of moving on. 

Take Time for Yourself

Self-love and self-care is an important part of living a happy and healthy life. Looking after yourself both physically and mentally is extremely crucial, especially when dealing with a loss and missing someone. 

Self-care varies for many people; it could include something as simple as eating your favorite food, taking a walk, or reading a good book. Whatever it may be, self-care makes you feel better, reduces your stress levels, and leads to better relationships with yourself and others. Remember to always be kind to yourself, regardless of your situation. 

  • Get rid of stress – Research has shown that when you engage in activities that you enjoy, you will have lower stress levels, a lower heart rate, and a better mood. This results in having less time to fixate on the stressors that have been consuming your life. 
  • Get moving – Engaging in physical activities not only improves your physical health but your mental health as well. People who engage in these activities have reported having fewer days of poor mental health than those who didn’t engage in physical activities at all. 
  • Challenge your mind – Get a list of your biggest interests and jot them down. Do you enjoy art? Consider drawing, photography, or calligraphy. Interested in learning something new? Check for some courses offered at your local library or community college. Whatever it may be, challenging your mind leads to better mental well-being.

Do What You Love

Did you know that there are health benefits associated with engaging in hobbies or activities you like? Interestingly, doing what you love has proven to help people manage chronic pain, improve their heart health and add some quality years to their life. 

So, listen to yourself and find what you love, and let it help you cope with missing someone, whether it may be after a breakup, long-distance relationship, or any other cause. 

Nurture Your Connections

Feeling lonely after you lose a close connection is rather common, but too much of it may do more harm than good. Research has shown that loneliness is often associated with unhealthy behaviors that cause high blood pressure, elevated stress levels, and obesity. Notably, spending too much time apart from others can also put you at increased risk for depression, cognitive decline, and even dementia

This then brings us to the importance of social support. Social support is often identified as a key component of solid relationships and strong psychological health, but what exactly does it mean? Essentially, social support involves having a network of family and friends you can turn to in times of need. 

Whether you are facing a personal crisis or missing someone, these relationships have the power to make you feel better. Below are some suggested ways of nurturing your connections: 

  • Spend time together 
  • Express love 
  • Show gratitude
  • Be compassionate
  • Let go of little grievances
  • Be present

Consider Therapy

If you are feeling intense emotions, you can also consider turning to therapy. It’s common to experience grief after you have lost or separated from someone, but if these emotions are impacting your everyday life, you might be at risk of developing a complicated grief disorder. 

A therapist will help you look deeper into your experience and find ways to overcome past memories, deal with negative emotions, such as self-blame, and adapt to the new life. 

There are many forms of therapy that exist today that are specially designed to assist your needs, and most of them are easily accessible online. Online therapy is suited for people who don’t find it comfortable to attend in-person therapy. Here is a list of problems it can solve: 

  • Time-saving – These therapy sessions can be easily booked and conducted from the comfort of your home, no traveling required. 
  • Comfort – This is a significant benefit! Patients need to feel safe within their environment for the therapy session to flow effectively. 
  • Confidentiality – The Federal Council of Psychology is followed, where confidentiality is valued. All of your data remains secure through encryption. 
  • Cost-effectiveness – No travel and extra costs involved.  

Bottom Line 

Losing someone who was once a part of your life is never easy. As a result, trying to find how to deal with missing someone can sometimes be challenging. But even if it’s unavoidable, these feelings should not have a negative impact on your overall mental and physical well-being. 

However, we are often not well equipped to deal with these issues on our own and may need external assistance. If you find yourself greatly struggling, reach out for help from professionals. If you are considering online therapy as a way to deal with your current struggle, we are here to help you find a qualified therapist. 

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